Rawdogging 2026 With Iced Coffee and Millennial Delusion

Nobody prepared me for this version of adulthood.

I genuinely thought that turning 40 meant I'd own crisp cream-colored, perfectly tailored khaki pants and cute but still fun blouses. I'd have cute handbags and matching sensible shoes. Think Sex In the City but no sex...nor a big city. I'd be emotionally regulated, grounded, healed. I'd know things like exactly what mutual funds do and watch stock prices. Instead, I'm rawdogging 2026 with iced coffee, anxiety, and a nervous system held together by playlists, sarcasm, and Jesus. It's rough yall...

I thought 40 would feel grounded and empowering. Instead, it feels like overwhelm and exhaustion with one soul-crushing realization after the next. So far, I give 2026 a 0/10 and do not recommend.

One of the crazier things that's taken me aback on this newly 40 journey is this sense of trying to figure out who the heck I am now. Sure, I'm a wife, a mother, a daughter, and a friend. I'm also a decent elder millennial dirtbike rider. Despite knowing all these things I am, I still don't feel like I know WHO I am at times. I know this for certain: Much of my identity is wrapped tightly around being a mother - a journey that I truly believe is my purpose. The difficult thing is that my son requires a different version of the mother I identified as for the last 14 years. Navigating the trickiness of fostering independence in your children and simultaneously grieving their independence is insanity. Parenting teenagers is like holding on and letting go at the same time - 'issa wild ride, y'all.

Another unwelcomed surprise is the busyness. I am convinced we are in the sandwich generation folks. Everyone needs a piece of us (queue Britney Spears "You wanna piece of me") - we are someone's wife/husband, someone's daughter/son, someone's mother/father, someone's emotional support person. And still, with all of these responsibilities, we are expected to drink enough water, eat enough protein, and answer work emails politely. Its Tew Much.

As if all of this isn’t chaotic enough, the harsh reality of caring for your aging parents enters the chat. One minute they're teaching you how to drive and the next you are googling medication names and trying not to panic. The fact that there is no manual for this is soul-crushing. How are we in 2026 and no one can direct our paths? Can someone please make a slide deck on how the hell we are supposed to do this? Nursing homes, elder care, Medicare, Hospice, Lewy Body Dementia, sundowning...all the things.

This era feels heavy, and I'm pretty certain my coping mechanisms aren't the best, but they certainly could be worse I suppose. My current wellness routine is caffeine, disassociation, and pretending a new book will fundamentally alter my life. I'm finding that no amount of doomscrolling, sourdough baking, rage-cleaning, adding to cart, or crying in the car really helps.

Sure, my old-lady HRT helps with the menopausal rage (or does it, lol?) and walking bare foot in the yard is calming, but honestly, I'm leaning more and more on my faith to get me through. Maybe this is all by design, you know? So much of this season is out of our hands. It is bending me almost to breaking but this life was never meant to be easy, and it sure as shit isn't.

One thing for sure, two things for certain...all lies - I don't know anything for certain, lol. However, I have a sneaking suspicion that this chapter isn't about having it all figured out. And maybe, despite everything, we are doing better than we think...

In addition to lots of coffee and Jesus, here are a few of my Feral Millennial things I am leaning into during the chaos:

• · A weighted heating pad - sis, you NEED ONE

• · Long hot baths with all the magnesium salts

• · Eye brightening concealer...to conceal ALL THE THINGS

• · Eyepod weighted eye mask = Add to cart

• · Laughing with friends and family

• · Watching our son grow into a genuinely good person

Friends, if you purchase through any of these affiliate links, I get a small thank you (at no extra cost to you) 🤗